


Differently Similar

by mimirexx



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Beating, Character Death, Coming Out, Depression, Disappointment, Fights, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, M/M, Mentions of Cancer, Much weird shit, One-Sided Attraction, Sad, Smut, Tears, some eremin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-25
Updated: 2019-03-22
Packaged: 2019-08-29 12:04:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16743649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mimirexx/pseuds/mimirexx
Summary: They met in an unfortunate way but found out that blaming and forgiving, pain and pleasure, loneliness and company were all things they could only process together.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just trying out something again. 
> 
> I hope to be able to update regularly, but please be patient with me as I’m pretty busy sometimes. I’ll be trying my best!

Rain poured down in the whole city for days already, there was no end in sight. It seemed to be a dark and gloomy day with no smiles and no happy faces anywhere.

It would’ve been like that, wouldn’t there be this young brunet who lit up the harsh atmosphere with his smile. A smile so simple yet so bright, big green eyes gleaming with joy.

“They said she could leave the hospital today already! I’m so glad!” The boy exclaimed, holding a huge bouquet of beautiful, colorful flowers in his arms.

He didn’t mind the rain. The rain was actually refreshing and a sign for the start of something new. A new part of his life was about to start and the boy was eager to take his mother home again.

His mother was diagnosed with breast cancer almost a year ago, her chances of survival were small but, almost like a miracle, the doctors said she was recovering well and would be leaving the hospital soon. 

“Do you think mom will like the flowers? I made sure to only get the most beautiful ones!” He sounded almost worried, wanting his mother to be happy and like the flowers he bought for her. His mother meant everything to him, she was the most important person in his life. He loved her dearly.

“Eren,” A blond boy spoke with a small laugh, “The flowers are great, your mom will love them. Stop worrying so much.”

Armin was Eren’s childhood friend. They met a decade ago and were inseparable ever since. There were the occasional smaller fights and arguments, but they could hardly stay mad at each other for too long. It was just how their friendship worked and always would work. They trusted each other blindly and only wanted the best for the other.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Eren laughed as well, shaking his head a little while he did, “I’m just so excited! I can’t wait to finally take her ho—”

He couldn’t even finish his sentence and suddenly was pushed to the ground by a harsh force against him which made him hit his back against the hard stone ground.

 

 

 

There was a man with a hood and a bag who seemed to be in a rush and was now on the ground next to Eren. This man looked pissed and in trouble, hectic and angry. His dark eyes glaredthrough the rain, right into Eren’s emerald ones.

The raven looked disgusted to be covered in mud which probably made him angrier than the actual fall itself.

“Hey! Can’t you even look where you’re walking?!” Eren snapped, sounding pissed now that thanks to this man his flowers were muddy and ruined. He could hardly give these to his mother.

Before the man could even give any answer, the police men could be heard chasing for him.

“There he is!” One of them shouted and they both rushed over to the two boys on the ground.

“Tch!” Was everything that came from the raven before he forced himself up on his feet immediately and began running away. He was pretty fast and not even Eren could say anything more.

 

But Eren didn’t care about this man for now, his mother was more important, so he let the police take care of him. The brunet looked down and lifted the flowers, which fell apart, and in his anger, he just threw them down again, a frown working it’s way on his face.

“Fucking bastard,” He muttered through gritted teeth and let out a huff. It was then when Armin came and helped him up. The poor boy was terrified by what happened and only now gathered himself again to help his friend.

Eren stood and looked down at himself, cringing when he saw how dirty his clothes now were. “How am I supposed to go to a hospital like that? They won’t even let me in and certainly won’t let me see mom either!” He sighed with a mix of sadness and despair, knowing that a hospital had to be kept clean for their patients.

“Come, let’s go back so you can change your clothes. Then we’ll buy new flowers, alright?” The blond offered with a kind smile and lead them both back to Erens home.

 

 

 

It took them about ten minutes and Eren was dressed in clean clothes and was already outside to buy new flowers. These costed him the last money he had left but it definitely was worth it when these flowers were for his mother. She deserved the most beautiful things on the world and Eren would sell anything if it meant to see her smile or have her get healthy again.

The medicaments she had to take were quite expensive but luckily there was still his father who paid most of them. Eren paid some with the little money he earned with his job since he wanted to help her recover as well.

 

 

 

Equipped with fresh flowers and clean clothes, the two boys finally arrived at the hospital with big smiles. Eren forgot about that man at this point and just focused on the one important thing in his life.

“Good morning. I’d like to visit my mother, Carla Jaeger.” The brunet spoke at the counter and got the usual smile from the woman that sat there.

She spoke kindly, “Of course.” After writing down some things she sent the two boys to the second floor where his mother’s room was. They thanked her and walked upstairs, the excitement evident in the brunet’s eyes the closer they got to her room.

 

To their dismay, the room was empty but Eren just walked inside and went to sit at the table that stood there, deciding to wait for his mother to come back. It happened sometimes that she was busy with some other things the doctor needed her to do.

Both boys sat there in silence for quite a while. There was no sign of his mother anywhere.

That confused Eren only more but he figured it might be something about his mother needing to take her medicaments first or she had to go and sign some papers or something of that sort.

Only then, he noticed that his mother’s bed was missing and the longer nobody came, the more Eren got worried.

Waiting was tense and the time didn’t seem to pass. “What if something happened?” Eren sounded in panic, tapping his fingers impatientlyagainst the surface of the table.

“You shouldn’t assume the worst, we just now came,” Armin was quick to assure his friend, not wanting him to get too worried if they didn’t know what happened yet- it could be nothing! But Armin was aware that someone being gone for this long didn’t particularly mean something good. He was worried too.

The brunet just sighed, trying to stay calm.

Walking around the room, staring towards the door or doing nothing at all; nothing helped him to not worry.

 

 

 

“That’s enough!” Twenty long minutes passed and Eren snapped, “I can’t sit around any longer!” Not knowing where his mother was was very hard so he decided to just leave the room and go and ask where she was- someone had to know why she wasn’t in her room! And why her bed was missing!

His blond friend wordlessly followed him quickly, hurrying behind him out of the room and walking by his side as they headed to the reception.

Though, the young boy did not expect to see the doctor who was treating his mother to walk up to them midway. Both boys stood immediately and greeted the doctor and, slowly but surely, Eren was starting to feel more nervous and scared there might be something seriously wrong. There was that unpleasant and worrisome feeling in his stomach that just wouldn’t leave.

“Sir... Can you tell me where my mother is? We’re taking her home today, but she’s not in her room...” He was gripping the flowers so tight with his shaking hands, his knuckles turned white. Armin placed a gentle hand on his shoulder to try to keep him calm but even his hand was shaking.

The man’s face was filled with worry and concern as he reached out to place his hand on his shoulder as well. He lead the two boys into a separate room where they sat down.

 

 

 

A few moments of silence passed, the tension in the air more than evident, before the doctor finally spoke up;

“...I’m sorry.”

Only these two words made Erens heart race like crazy while his eyes filled with tears almost immediately.

“Wh-what..?” He stuttered, his breath hitching, his voice shaking, his tears dripping, “W-what do you m-mean?”

“...It turned out that the tumor was malignant, not benign as we thought. The tumor unknowingly spread through her body and attacked her... She passed away about half an hour ago, there was nothing we could do... I’m sorry.” It was by far the hardest part of his job. Even if this man seemed to have decades of experience of being a doctor, he still struggled to get the words out.

Eren’s big eyes got even bigger as he stared at the man before him in disbelief. There were so many things he felt in that moment, so many things that went through his head, so many things he wanted to say and do, but Eren was too shocked to react to anything, he needed a little longer to progress what this man just said.

Tears dripped down Armins face together with small sobs. He knew Carla ever since he was a kid, she was like his mother and treated him like her son after his own parents had a very unfortunate accident. So, hearing of her death now was really hard for him too.

 

 

 

“You can’t be fucking serious now!” Eren yelled, anger deciding to take over his body and mind.

“Why haven’t you checked on her good enough?! Why is she here if you don’t keep your damned eyes on her?! Huh?! You call yourself a doctor, then why haven’t you helped her?!” His fist slammed against the desk while he spoke. Tears did roll down his face and Eren was devastated, but in that moment, his anger was stronger.

“We did what we could but-“ 

“Shut the fuck up! You let her die! You let her fucking die! My mother is dead because of you!” Eren was blinded by his anger and threw the flowers to the ground so he could reach over and grab the man by his collar.

“She didn’t deserve to die! But you do! You didn’t help her so nobody will help you either!” Just when Eren was about to punch him right in the face, Armin quickly pulled him back.

“E-Eren! You can’t just hit him!” He spoke worriedly, dragging his friend towards the door while the doctor coughed a little after being grabbed like that. He stayed calm, though, and did not try to do or say anything. He understood Eren’s anger, it was totally reasonable.

“They did what they were a-able to do... Sometimes cancer c-can’t be treated... You need to stay calm, okay? Pl-please—”

“Armin, you don’t fucking understand! You can’t be serious!”

“I do,” The blond said assuringly, looking up with sad eyes, “I do understand, I promise I do. But please calm down, Eren. Your mother wouldn’t want you to get this angry...”

Eren stared down at the shorter male, his eyes filled with anger. But this anger slowly faded and was replaced with sorrow. He sniffled softly and looked down, understanding that Armin had made a point.

 

His mother was against everything that involved fighting or arguing; violence in general. She always found that talking things out was better for both sides and avoided more complications. She is- was... a good woman. 

The brunet lowered his head so it was resting between Armins shoulder and neck and wrapped his arms securely around his friend, squeezing him tightly. Then the crying and sobbing started, despair filling his body and soul. His cries echoed through the room and every hallway, the hospital sounding only more like a place of gloom and misery than it already did.

Erens body shook terribly. With every gasp and every sob that left his throat, his body shrunk further into himself, feeling worn out, weak, exhausted, simply destroyed. And there was nothing that could help him in that moment.

He lost the source of his bliss and joy, lost the reason for his smile and laugh.

Everything was perfect until that day.

Until the day Carla Jaeger passed away.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it’s pretty much Eremin right now but I promise there will be more Levi soon! Just building up the story a little for now! 
> 
> Also, if someone’s interested in being a beta reader or something of that sort, please contact me on Tumblr @ arminissues !
> 
> English isn’t my native language and my vocabulary is very poor, therefore it’d be great to have someone looking over my stuff before posting it (*´ω`*)

Hours passed, filled with nothing but tears, pure agony and pain over the loss of Eren’s mother.

Armin got Eren home and stayed over for the next day but gave Eren some space afterwards since both boys, and most of all Eren, needed some time to deal with everything that was happening currently for themselves. 

The funeral took place three days after Eren and Armin visited the hospital and ever since, the brunet hasn’t stepped out of the house. His brain still couldn’t progress that his mother really wasn’t there anymore, that she was gone, forever.

There was no one to wake him with a bright smile every morning, no one to come home to, no one that would tell Eren he did well even if his grades weren’t very good. His mother cherished every small achievement and made it known, supported Eren whenever he needed help and guided him on the right path.

His father, on the other hand, never really did much for him. He was barely home and when he was, all he did was scolding Eren for not studying enough and not getting good grades and getting into fights too often. Their bond wasn’t even nearly as close as Eren and his mother’s, they didn’t spend any time together when he was home either. It wasn’t like Eren hated his father, but he definitely felt neglected and overseen most of the time, pretty much ignored.

His adoptive sister Mikasa, contrarily, was always praised by him. She was always the ‘good child’ in their father’s eyes thanks to her good grades and good behavior in school and never causing any trouble. She was the _perfect_ daughter.

Eren wasn’t jealous of her, rather annoyed. Thank God his mother treated them the same at least. He felt loved and accepted by his mother in every single way, but now that she was gone, the only source of love and support he had was gone as well.

He was lonely even if his father now stayed home more often to take care of him and Mikasa- less of Eren but it was alright. They barely spoke, Eren didn’t even really talk with Mikasa to begin with.

It was a shame; they used to be so close. Mikasa always was so protective of him and was there immediately when Eren got in trouble to help him out. He honestly had no idea when she decided to shift so extremely, but it happened one day and it wasn’t in his control to change anything, especially not now that their mother died.

They probably should’ve grown closer after that heartbreaking event, but she got even more distant, as ironic as it sounded, and Eren felt simply helpless. He just had to take it as it was, though, and swallow it down.

 

 

 

It was almost two weeks later when Eren finally was dragged out of home, only because Armin forced him to leave the house so he would write their last exam that would pretty much determine their future.

“I don’t want to, Armin. I’ll fail the exams anyway, so why bother?” Eren’s voice changed from the usually happy and chripy one to a monotone and sad one.

Because what was the point of writing the exams if he was going to fail them one way or another?

Armin, on the other hand, wasn’t as pessimistic about the exams as Eren was and tried to encourage him. “You have to write them! If your score is good, we can go to the same college. Wouldn’t that be great? Just you and me.”

The brunet considered the idea for a moment or two before he shrugged, “Yeah... Guess you’re right.”

It weirdly helped and Eren felt a little better and a little more determined to at least _try_ his best. Armin was his best friend, if they could go to the same college, life would be much easier and better. He didn’t give a damn about abandoning his father or sister, he just needed Armin who supported him in every situation now in place of his mother.

He still looked sad but Armin sensed that small change of behavior and was a little proud of himself for achieving that.

 

The boys soon arrived at school and took a seat as the teacher began speaking and explaining how the exam would take place and how much time they had, general things. It was their last exam and at the same time, the most important one.

Eren boredly listened to the woman speaking and sighed in annoyance. He just wanted to get it done already so he could go back home- or maybe he would go over to Armin’s place, at least he’d avoid his family this way.

Soon enough, the exam was on his desk and he stared down at the papers, his brows furrowed.

 _You can do it,_ he told himself, _just focus! Mom would be so proud of you if you get a good score, so focus! Focus!_

With a deep breath, Eren opened the first page of the exam and began reading through the task.

As everyone began writing, Eren sat there dumbfounded and simply stared down at the paper with wide eyes.

...When did they even learn all _that_?

He looked around; everyone looked so focused on their work and wrote so furiously, yet there was Eren who had no clue of anything.

Shaking his head a little, he looked back down at his own paper.

_FOCUS!_

He read the task slower, tried to focus more and then started writing things down. It was like he forgot everything they ever did in school but Eren strained himself and managed to answer almost every question.

He didn’t finish it all because time was already over, but he did a good 80% and now just had to hope that it wasn’t complete bullshit.

The teached collected the exams and wished the students a good day, then left the room.

Eren got up from his seat and felt annoyed but also nervous. If he didn’t make it, he’d have to stay in high school another year or just go and work somewhere. If he did well enough, he and Armin could stay together for longer.

But... somehow Eren had a bad feeling. Armin was by far one of the best students in the whole school- how could he even consider getting close to his score? Armin doubtlessly would have 100% while Eren could be happy if he got 40% of the questions right. He was scared but didn’t tell Armin that; he didn’t want his friend to feel bad about being better than him.

On their way back, Eren was dead silent. Armin tried to start a conversation a few times but all he got from Eren in response were simple “mhm”s or “yeah”s.

 

 

 

Luckily it didn’t take long and they already reached Armin’s home, heading to his room. He casually let himself fall into Armin’s bed and stared up at the ceiling.

Soon, there was a gentle weight on his chest and Eren looked down to see Armin laying there. It wasn’t anything new that they cuddled, Eren liked it.

So, the taller male wrapped his arms around his friend and held him close as his hand gently ran through his blond locks. His hair was so soft and fluffy, Eren loved playing with it.

“I fucked up.” He stated after some silence passed and sighed deeply, “I didn’t even finish, but I did pretty much. So... if what I could do is right, I still could have a decent score.”

The blonde hummed in acknowledgment and snuggled his chest with a nod, “I’m sure you did well enough. If you did your best, it can’t be bad!” He exclaimed, lifting his head and giving Eren a happy smile.

Eren was about to protest, but he could hardly say anything when Armin was looking at him like that, his eyes were practically gleaming, so he nodded in return and just patted his head, working up a little smile for him.

“Alright, I think you have a point there. Let’s hope for the best then.” He sounded a bit more determined and squeezed his friend close.

They let some silence pass with just enjoying each other’s company and the feeling that at least one goddamned person on the earth actually cared for them.

 

But Eren soon broke that silence,

“Thank you, Armin...” He mumbled once his face was pressed into the other’s neck and closed his eyes when he felt Armin stroking his hair.

“...I have n-no idea what I‘d do without you. Thank you so much... f-for everything.” His voice was trembling a little.

Armin knew this was an emotional moment for Eren, so he held him to assure him and rubbed his back.

_“It’s okay.”_

_“I’m here.”_

_“You’re not alone.”_

_“I’ll always be there for you.”_

Armin’s words visibly comforted him and helped him to not start crying again. He kept his composure and just stayed hidden in his neck, his arms wrapped around Armin’s slim waist securely.

Before any of them knew it, they fell asleep just like that, letting the world around them fade, and just focused on each other in a peaceful sleep- the first peaceful sleep Eren got ever since he came back from the hospital.

 

 

 

Eren was the first to wake up hours later. He looked out of the window and saw the night sky, deciding to watch the stars for a few moments. It was calming.

He then felt someone moving and looked down at himself to see that Armin laid between his legs and on his chest where he seemingly was sleeping happily.

Eren tilted his head up gently and brushed some of the blond hair back to get a better view on his face. Armin’s skin looked just perfect, his cheeks chubby and his lips soft.

Eren just now realized how beautiful Armin was and blushed faintly at that, sensing how his pants suddenly started feeling tight.

He watched his friend for some while and soon found himself kissing his lips which, unfortunately for Eren, woke the sleeping boy.

The blond opened his eyes and widened them when he saw that Eren was kissing him and felt something hard against his stomach, pulling back quickly.

“E-Eren..! Wha-... What are you doing..?” He asked as he pushed himself up with his hands and stared at the other, a blush rising to his own cheeks in embarrassment.

“I uh...” Eren scratched the back of his neck and looked away from Armin to find the right words. “I guess I... kissed you?” He said finally and slowly looked back at Armin, chuckling awkwardly.

“Y-yeah, I know that! But... but why? Eren, I mean...” The blond looked away with a sigh, not knowing what to say.

The blush that adorned Armin’s cheek made Eren’s heart race and caused even more heat to go down to his groin which started to make him uncomfortable.

He didn’t say anything more and sat up so he could pull Armin into another kiss.

Suddenly, he felt himself being pushed back and blinked in confusion, staring at his friend.

“E-Eren!” Armin repeated with a hiss, his eyes wide as he took some distance. “I don’t... I don’t feel this way...” He mumbled and looked away from him as he continued,

“...I could never feel this way for a _guy_.”

 

Eren sat in anxious silence, listening when Armin spoke and lowering his gaze at that.

“Oh.” He sounded quietly, but this small sound was filled with a lot of pain since he could perceive Armin’s discomfort and... something he could only identify as disgust.

Being rejected from his best friend like that hurt him- he of course understood if Armin didn’t want it- but it still made his heart ache, the words hurting so bad, mostly because he just ruined their whole friendship like that.

“I’m sorry... I guess I should... uh... just go... or something... yeah.” Eren got up from the bed and left the room without another word.

He got outside and grew even sadder when he noticed that Armin didn’t even try to hold him back or tell him they could talk about it, so decided to just keep walking.

 

 

 

 _That’s it,_ he thought, _I lost him too._

It was Eren’s fault and Eren’s fault only, he shouldn’t have kissed him, now Eren felt lonely all over again. He couldn’t ever look Armin in the eyes and knew Armin wouldn’t want to talk to him anymore after that.

Did that really make him disgusting? Or weird? Or creepy? Did Armin think of him as loathsome and gross now? Only because he was attracted to _guys_?

He couldn’t help the way he felt, he just saw Armin sleeping like that and had to kiss him even if it wasn’t right, got hard from just looking at his sleeping form, but now he started regretting it.

Armin was the only person supporting him- how could he even dare to do such a thing without knowing if Armin wanted it too? He felt so stupid.

 

 

 

Eren stopped walking once he found himself in a park and sat on the bench, taking a deep breath to clear his mind. He got his phone out and decided to text Armin but already saw that Armin sent him a message not so long ago;

_‘I’m sorry how I reacted, it wasn’t right. I didn’t mean to push you and didn’t mean to hurt you with what I said. I honestly didn’t. I’m really sorry, Eren.’_

Eren closed his eyes for a moment before he replied;

_‘Hey, don’t worry about it. It’s fine, you had all right to push me back. I shouldn’t have done that, it’s my fault.’_

It took a few minutes and there popped up a message again;

_‘We’re still friends, right? That doesn’t have to change anything between us! We can act like it never happened!’_

Eren sighed and typed simply;

_‘Yes, Armin. Of course we’re still friends.’_

But Eren knew that a lot changed between them now, and that nothing would be like it used to be before, that they couldn’t be friends anymore.

_‘Good, I really don’t want to lose you because of that. If you aren’t home already, you can come over again. We can watch a movie, if you like? Or play some video games?’_

Eren inhaled deeply. Going back now wasn’t a good idea, he needed some time to get a grip on himself again.

_‘I’m already laying in bed. See you tomorrow?’_

_‘Definitely!’_ Armin replied quickly.

 

 

 

Eren put his phone away after that and looked down. It was cold, now that it already was past midnight, but he didn’t mind that, all he was thinking about was Armin.

His mind was going crazy and the bulge in his pants wasn’t getting any better. Eren then realized that only Armin could help him with feeling better in that particular area.

He looked around. Luckily, there was nobody else in the park, so Eren unzipped his pants and pulled them down partly, followed by his boxers.

His shaft twitched at the cold wind and stood while Eren took his member into his hand and began stroking himself.

While he did, he closed his eyes and imagined Armin, a soft moan coming from him.

His silky hair, the fine lines on his face, his soft lips, his adorable nose, his bright eyes, his frail body, his lightly curved hips, his perfectly round ass.

“Ar-Armin... Fuck, Armin!” He breathed out and picked up the pace, panting. Pre fluids already spilled as Eren started pumping himself and tossed his head back. “Ah...”

It was the first time he ever did something like that and it felt so good although he also felt bad for doing this. But that didn’t bother him now and he continued, his stomach tightening and his breath escalating.

He felt himself coming closer and closer until he finally released and let out one last moan, feeling more at ease now that his problem was taken care of.

When he looked down after catching his breath, he saw the mess he caused over his hand and sighed as he pulled his hand away and took a tissue from his pocket to clean himself with.

Once he was done, he tucked himself in again and closed his pants, sitting there for a little longer in silence as he just stared at nothing at all and enjoyed the silence and loneliness for once.

 

About an hour later, he got up and walked back home. His father and Mikasa were already sleeping, which didn’t surprise Eren at all, they didn’t worry about him being gone for too long. He just walked into the bathroom and took a shower, then went to bed and tried to sleep.

This night, he couldn’t find any sleep and so just laid awake until morning. The next day, he didn’t go to see Armin like he promised him, neither the day after that nor the one after that. Eren was back to his introverted self and stayed in his room all day and all night.

He didn’t talk to anyone and didn’t pick up his phone when Armin called him. The door to his room was locked so even if Armin came, he wouldn’t be able to drag him out again.

 

 

 

And Armin, indeed, got over the third day and tried to get Eren out, but when he didn’t get any response after knocking for ten minutes straight, he sighed and lowered his hand.

“...Alright, I get it.” He mumbled from the other side of the door and looked down.

Eren laid on his bed in silence in the meantime and just stared at the door. He couldn’t let Armin in, couldn’t look into his eyes anymore and had absolutely no clue what to tell his best friend.

They weren’t best friends anymore, probably not even friends. Eren kissed him and grossed him out, Armin most likely only pitied him and tried to keep up what couldn’t be saved anymore. He couldn’t see Armin as only his friend anymore and didn’t want to bother him with it.

The blond didn’t have many friends to begin with, and with Eren being his best friend, he didn’t try to spend much time with others either.

So maybe Armin just was scared of being alone and told himself he and Eren still could be friends like they used to be. What he didn’t know was that they couldn’t, no matter how hard they tried.

“I won’t bother you anymore, I see you don’t want me here. If you ever want to talk or meet or anything... just call me... okay..? See you, Eren...”

And with that, Armin left the house and left Eren alone in his room, like he wanted to.

Eren didn’t bother to call Armin or try to build up any conversation with him, just staying on the bed in his room.

He was glad that he had enough food in his room to feed him for a few days longer but his reserves slowly came to an end and one day Eren was forced to leave his room reluctantly and had to prepare for trouble coming his way. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yoo, this chapter took me a while to finish because I’ve been dealing with some bullshit irl but I tried to at least make it some longer to make up for it ^^;

Eren hated it, but he had to get out of his room if he liked it or not- he had no problem with staying in there forever, really, but he didn’t want to starve in there. At least not _yet_. 

He wrapped his blanket over his shoulders and left his room, praying to God that nobody was in the kitchen. It was afternoon so Eren thought his father and sister might have better things to do than to sit in the kitchen. 

Well, turns out he was deadly wrong. 

 

 

 

There they were, sitting at the kitchen table, minding their own business until Eren came. 

His father lowered the newspaper when he heard Eren coming in, Mikasa did the same with her phone and they both stared over at the brunet. 

The ravenette shrugged and just turned back to her phone, texting her friends. She didn’t seem to have an issue with the fact she hasn’t seen her brother for _weeks_. 

ON the other hand, his father looked somewhat mad and angry, staring at his son with a frown. 

 

Eren sighed deeply and walked over to the fridge to get something to eat. Just when he was about to reach out and open the door, his father spoke, 

“Care to explain what _this_ is?” The man shoved a letter closer to Eren and eyed him. 

The brunet winced a little, already regretting even leaving his room. He was in trouble but he had no idea why, though, he could tell it wasn’t because he didn’t come out of his room for so long. Something has happened and he was about to find out, so he slowly turned around and stared down at the letter that sat on the table. 

 

 

 

Sighing deeply, he lifted the letter and opened it to read, his eyes widening. 

Once he read that the letter was from his school, he immediately skipped to the important part;

 

_Student: Eren Jaeger_

_Score: 65%_

_Status: Passed._

 

“-Oh my God!” He exclaimed in disbelief, staring at his score; he didn’t only pass, it also was one of the best grades he ever got!

“I can’t believe it!” He smiled and looked up at his father again, joy and pride gleaming in his eyes, “This is _amazing_! That’s—” He stopped himself when he saw his father’s frown deepening and got confused. 

Without losing a word, Grisha stood up, raised his hand, and smacked his son across the face roughly, the loud sound echoing through the whole room which then fell into a dead silence.

 

 

 

Eren stood there with wide eyes, his breath trembling and his cheek throbbing. He couldn’t understand anything anymore. 

 

“You’re happy with this grade?” The man asked lowly, slapping his son once again with even more force. 

The boy gasped a few times and took a step back, hiding his face into his blanket as he looked over at Mikasa, his stomach dropping when he saw she gave no single fuck about what was just happening to him and just kept texting her friends. 

His eyes filled with tears, his body began shaking and Eren had no clue what he should do now- he could hardly hit his father back, after all! 

His tears weren’t from feeling sadness or pain, rather from being so angry about what was just happening and not being able to do anything in return to defend himself. 

 

His knuckles turned white from how hard he was gripping his blanket to hold back from doing anything to his father. He wanted to slap him, punch him, kick him, anything! He definitely was stronger than him. 

He wanted to beat up that man, wanted to devour him alive for daring to slap him because of a shitty grade, but something deep inside told him that it wouldn’t be right. His mother wouldn’t like it, so Eren didn’t do anything. 

 

 

 

“I fucking _passed_ ,” He snarled lowly, moving his gaze back up at his father and glaring right into his eyes, “And that’s the only thing that’s important to me.”

Suddenly, he was aware of a hand gripping his hair and almost lifting him up the floor. “Oh? And what college do you think will take you with grades as low as your damned attitude?!”

“What, now you suddenly care about me?!” Eren snapped and gritted his teeth, “You don’t give a fuck about me when I starve and am gone for days, but when it comes to my fucking grades you act like a fucking asshole?!”

And there already came the next slap. “You don’t talk to me like that!”

The brunet panted through gritted teeth, his eyes narrowing as he finally pushed his father back so he’d let go of his hair. 

“Guys, could you maybe do your fighting somewhere else?” Mikasa spoke boredly, glancing up from her phone at them, “It’s annoying.”

And Eren lost it. 

 

How could she- no, how could _both_ of them be like that?! His father was hitting him because he didn’t get the grade he was expecting and his sister was annoyed from their shouting instead of helping him? That situation was the worst and Eren saw only one thing he could do now; 

 

“I’m fucking leaving this house! I’m sick of you both!” He snatched the paper from the table and stomped back into his room, slamming the door shut behind him. 

“I’d like seeing you do that, Eren Jaeger!” His father shouted after him but Eren simply didn’t care anymore. 

 

 

 

He was fine with staying there on his own and live peacefully without having to talk to or interact with either of them, but this was going too far and he wasn’t staying there any longer than necessary. 

Sure, he had no place to go, yet, he would rather sleep on the streets than in this house. He would manage it somehow, that wasn’t his biggest worry at the moment. 

 

And just like that, Eren grabbed a bag and shoved everything inside that he thought he could need and was important. Apart from clothes, he also made sure to get the pictures of him and his mother and put them deep inside the bag so he could be sure he wouldn’t lose them. Other than that, there were only a few more sentimental things he packed before he looked around the room one last time to be sure he hadn’t forgotten anything. 

He stopped his gaze when he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror of his closet and looked at his bruised cheek; it was already red and blue, dark and swollen. Needless to say, it hurt a lot. The print of his father’s hand was obvious and made him frown. 

Leaving like that would probably draw more attention than he felt comfortable with, so he grabbed a scarf and put it on, making sure it would cover his face good enough to not let the bruise show too much. 

 

When he was sure he got everything, Eren quietly locked the door and opened the window of his room. He threw out his bag first, then climbed out himself and landed on the ground with a small thud. 

Glancing at his house one last time, Eren soon carried his belongings and began walking away from that place, going as far away as even possible. 

 

 

 

So many memories were in that house, so many things that reminded him of the good old days with his mother and Armin, and so much that was holding him back from leaving. But at the same time, there were so many things that showed Eren he simply didn’t belong there any longer. 

And so, leaving was a little easier. 

 

Step for step, the brunet moved farther and farther away from his home. Of course, leaving was also connected with a good amount of pain and sorrow but he was ready to take all this if it meant his father and sister wouldn’t keep making his life a living hell. 

If Eren stayed there any minute longer, that calm and isolated life he had would be interrupted by his family every time he tried to be alone. Now that the results of his exams came, his father would keep annoy him with it and make his life harder than it already was. He could tell. 

 

 

 

The boy walked around until he spotted a small tea shop he never really had seen before and already felt his stomach growling; he was hungry and would eat just anything now. 

After glancing around to be sure there was no one he knew, he approached the tea shop and walked inside. He almost immediately was greeted by a comfortable warmth and sighed softly while looking down at the floor for a few moments in silence. 

 

“Good afternoon!” A voice chirped up and Eren looked up to see a woman with glasses and a ponytail standing at the counter, having a gentle and kind smile on her lips. 

“...Hey,” Eren greeted in return, not as happy as her, but it didn’t look like it was bothering her much, she still smiled at him. 

It was the first time Eren was in that tea shop and it actually looked pretty comfy. There were couches and beanbags instead of chairs, graffitis on the walls; it made a pretty modern and youthful appearance but was somehow still kept neat and made him feel welcomed. 

 

The brunet walked over to the counter and looked up at the chart. There were mostly only drinks but they luckily also had sandwiches. 

“I take the bacon sandwich,” He decided and ran a hand through his hair. 

“Bacon sandwich,” The woman confirmed, “Anything else?”

Eren got out his wallet, “Tea. Black.” He placed the money on the counter and shoved his hands into his pockets again. 

“Great choice! Please take a seat,” The woman said kindly and turned around to prepare the food. 

Eren just nodded in response and turned away to walk over to one of the couches. He placed his bag on the floor next to the furniture and let himself sink into the couch with an exhausted sigh. 

 

 

 

His eyes fluttered shut, his back pressing against the soft fabric of the couch and relaxing ever so slightly. 

He was about to let his body relax completely but suddenly felt something vibrating in his pocket. Annoyedly, he opened his eyes and pulled his phone out to look at the person that was calling him. 

_Armin._

Out of all people that could call him, it had to be Armin... how great. 

 

Eren was hesitant to pick up and stared down at his phone. Why did Armin have to call in a moment like this? What did he even want after not talking for more than two weeks? Would he still want to try to save their friendship? 

He was a little scared and insecure, taking a deep breath to clear his mind. Whatever it was that Armin wanted, it really had to be important if he decided to call him after Eren made clear he wanted to be left alone. 

 

 

 

Eren hesitated a moment longer and exhaled slowly. He couldn’t just ignore Armin like that and so decided to pick up,

“Hey.” He said simply. 

“Oh my God, Eren! I’m so glad you answered!” Eren could hear the smile behind Armins voice. 

“Yeah,” He answered shortly and looked around the shop a bit. 

Luckily for him, there wasn’t anyone else in there so he didn’t feel too uncomfortable with talking- apart from the obvious discomfort coming from talking to Armin again after so long. 

“I got my score today- did you pass? Did you get enough points? I know you told me you couldn’t do everything but you co—“

“I passed.” Eren stated firmly, interrupting Armin in mid sentence. 

“You passed! I knew you would! I told you you could do it!” The blond cheered but Eren stayed more or less without reaction- he would’ve probably been happily cheering with Armin now but his father ruined it for him so he couldn’t be as happy about it as he wished he would. 

“Mhm.” A short hum, the only thing coming from him. 

The blond stopped in his cheering once he sensed that Eren did not feel very well, instantly getting worried. “...Hey, what’s wrong?”

 

 

 

Eren just sighed; where to start and where to end? Telling Armin what happened wouldn’t help since the poor boy would probably end up thinking it was his fault; which wasn’t true since Armin reacted the way he felt comfortable with and Eren couldn’t and wouldn’t blame him for that. 

“It’s nothing,” He answered him evenly, his voice low and almost monotonous. 

“Don’t tell me it’s nothing when I clearly can hear you do _not_ feel good!” 

“Armin, I’m fine.” Eren insisted. 

“Stop that. I know you my whole life, I know when something is wrong. I _know_ you.” The blond sighed through the phone, “Come on, tell me.”

Eren sighed deeply and closed his eyes for a few moments. He trusted Armin and figured it’d be easier for him if he told him what happened. Building up lies would only cause more trouble and Eren certainly didn’t need that, not to mention that he always hated lying to Armin. “It’s just...” 

Armin waited patiently, not wanting to force it out of Eren to not make him uncomfortable. 

There was a long silence.

 

 

 

Eren sighed, “My dad kinda got mad at my grade and we fought...” He found that keeping it simple for now was better and paused, attempting to find a way to put it into words. “...So I left.” He added him bluntly, deciding to not sugar-coat it to spare himself unnecessary explaining. 

It made Armin gasp immediately, “What?? You can’t just leave like that! Where will you stay now? What will you do? You can’t live on the streets! Oh God, Eren...”

Eren sighed again, feeling a little annoyed; of course he was aware of everything Armin was telling him, he wasn’t stupid, it was true, but he didn’t want to go back either. 

“I’ll be fine. I found a hostel to stay at for now, don’t worry.” He tried to assure his former best friend so he at least didn’t have to deal with even more trouble. 

“You’re coming over _right now_. You will stay here with me.” 

It was the first time Armin ordered Eren like that to do something and it surprised him a bit in the first moment but no matter how much he wanted to.

“No. I’m not coming.” 

“You are!” Armin insisted. 

“I am not, Armin.” He said calmly, looking up when the woman came with his food, “I’m pretty busy now, gotta hang up. See ya.”

And just like that, Eren hung up on the phone without giving Armin the chance to say anything back. 

 

 

 

He felt weird now. They haven’t spoken for so long and Eren felt like, in a way, nothing had changed between them, Armin probably still was disgusted by him, even if things almost felt too familiar to how they used to be. He still couldn’t go back to him, though. It wasn’t possible, certainly not in the situation Eren was in that moment. 

Maybe one day they’d make up again and could be friends but it would take a lot of time until Eren could be sure things wouldn’t be awkward between them anymore.

 

The brunet looked down at the plate in front of him and rubbed the back of his neck before taking his food and taking a big bite of it. His stomach finally filled with food which made him feel a little better, it’s been a while since he last ate something proper. 

 

“Nah, nah. You shouldn’t eat too fast or your tummy will hurt!”

He raised a brow and slowly looked up when he saw that the woman that brought him the food still stood there and was grinning at him. 

Swallowing, he spoke confusedly, “Excuse me?”

“You need somewhere to stay, don’t you?” Her grin grew while all Eren did was staring at her. “I heard you on the phone and I can tell you were lying to whoever you were talking to!”

That woman definitely didn’t know what privacy was and shamelessly just listened to a stranger talking on the phone? She even took a seat right next to Eren on the couch and practically bounced on her spot. 

 

“...No,” He said slowly, giving her a weirded out look. 

“Of course you do! Stop acting like that and let’s get to the point; I can offer you a place to stay!” The unbelievably huge amount of happiness coming from her made Eren doubt any possibility he would go with her. Someone talking with that much joy to a stranger about taking him to a place he knew nothing about couldn’t end well, could it?

 

“No.” He furrowed his brows a little but that woman just wouldn’t stop bothering him. 

“It’ll be fun!” She exclaimed with a laugh.

“No.” Eren repeated annoyedly.

“So you’re agreeing to come with me?” She placed a hand on his shoulder. 

“ _No_.” He shoved the hand away and glared. 

“Amazing!” 

“Yeah, now lea-”

“I’ll meet you outside right after you finish your food! My shift ends in like ten minutes, then we can go!” 

“I said no-!“

“You’re welcome! See ya!” And as fast as she said that, that crazy woman was already gone and Eren had no chance to stop her. 

 

“That’s ridiculous..” He muttered to himself and just turned back to continue eating, trying to ignore what she said. 

 

 

 

But, somehow, her words gave him some hope- did she really have a place where he could stay? A new home? He didn’t have to sleep on the streets?

Suddenly, he felt eager to find out if her offer was genuine or not. If it was, he would be thankful that he could sleep somewhere inside. Even if it was on the floor, at least it’d be warm and he’d have a roof over his head. 

 

Eren finished his food in a few more minutes, sipping his hot beverage every now and then. When he was done, he looked over at the door with a small frown, debating whether or not he should go.

He decided to give it a try and so, slowly and hesitantly got up from the couch and threw his bag over his shoulder before making his way outside. 

Maybe going with a complete stranger was the stupidest thing he could ever do, so many things could go wrong, but Eren saw no other way in that moment.

 

 

 

He stood in the chilly air and looked around for the brunette that offered him a place to stay and scratched the side of his head a little. 

She couldn’t be seen anywhere no matter how long Eren stood there. He checked the time every now and then and sighed, his breath coming out in white puffs. 

“Where the hell is she?” He asked himself and leaned against the wall, letting his bag rest on the ground next to him. 

 

Eren looked up when he felt something dripping on him and shielded his face with his hand. 

Another droplet fell on him, followed by another one and another one and soon enough, Eren was soaked in the rain. It was just the start of a heavy storm. 

“Fucking shit,” He cursed under his breath and checked the time yet again, “I’m waiting for two fucking hours already! Where the hell is that woman?!” 

 

Eren clenched his teeth but it didn’t take long and he realized; that woman just messed with him. There was no place for him to stay and she was not picking him up either. It was just his fate that made it impossible for one good thing to happen in his life, Eren painfully became aware of it. 

And he couldn’t even be mad at this point, he should’ve seen it coming exactly the way it was happening in that moment because that was how his life would look like from now on. 

The brunet exhaled deeply and reached down to grab his bag, put it on his back and began walking. He had no idea where he should go, so just walked anywhere. 

 

 

 

He barely took two steps before he heard someone honking like a maniac. He was about to just ignore it and keep walking but the honking wasn’t stopping so Eren turned around to search for the car that was making that annoyingly loud noise. 

And once he spotted it, his expression fell. 

“Hey!! You!” A familiar voice called out, a hand waving from the inside of the car. “I’m here! C’mere!!”

 

Eren’s frown was deep as he clenched his fists tightly. She was in that damned car all the time and didn’t call him earlier? The hell was wrong with that woman?

He approached her and glared daggers into her eyes as the rain continued pouring. “You’ve been here all the time?” He questioned lowly. 

“Yep!!” She popped the ‘p’ playfully and let out a laugh. “I was waiting for you to come over- I’ve been waving at you all the time! Didn’t you see me?”

Eren looked over at where he was standing before, then looked back at this woman and simply shook his head. “No,” He said and exhaled deeply, “No, I didn’t.”

“Oh, well, that’s a shame. Anyway, jump in so we can-”

 

“-Wait.“ He narrowed his eyes slowly, “You’ve been sitting here for two hours... just waving instead of calling me when I was right in front of you..?”

“Yep!” She exclaimed proudly. 

“And you didn’t think it could be, uh...” 

“Hm?” She grinned innocently . 

“...Stupid? Just a bit?” He paused before adding firmly, “Actually, a lot.”

The brunette snorted and shrugged indifferently, “It was fun watching you!”

“It was fun watching me. Of course it was,” He deadpanned and pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing. “It was a stupid idea, I knew it was, but I didn’t want to believe it.”

 

 

 

“Awe, it’s not stupid!” The brunette giggled. “C’mon, let’s- hey! Where are you going?!” She called out for Eren who began to walk away from her. 

He already had enough of this woman and her stupid car and that so-called place he allegedly could stay at. If she already was acting this strange, he didn’t want to see where she wanted to take him. It’d be dumb to go. 

 

Next thing Eren was aware of was a hand grabbing his, so he turned around to stare at the other. 

“Hey..” She said soothingly and slowly pulled him a little closer, “What’s wrong? You don’t have to be alone in this world, nobody is alone even if you tell yourself that.”

Eren looked away from her with a frown but, surprisingly enough, he didn’t pull back just yet and stayed silent. 

“We all were supposed to be alone but we’re not because we are a family and we hold together and help each other. You don’t need to be related to someone to call them your family, you know?” She smiled, “I don’t have any blood related family but I still have people I love and care for the way you’d do for your family.”

He sighed but supposed she made a good point; it used to be the same with Armin. They weren’t related but it felt like Armin was part of his family. It always had been like that. “I know that..” His voice barely reached above a whisper, quiet and insecure. 

 

 

 

Eren had to think back to all these times he was with Armin, the times they just could let go of all the ugly reality and get lost in fantasies and dreams together. Be happy. Be carefree. _Together_. 

These times that were the only reason he still had some sanity left, somewhere. The only reason Eren was still standing at this point. He missed Armin a lot and just realized it with what this woman said. 

She looked like someone who only had bad and thoughtless ideas, caused messes and trouble, and never would say anything actually helpful, but he was wrong. So wrong. 

 

“...Hey, it’s okay.” The woman gently pulled the brunet even closer and slowly wrapped her arms around him. 

Eren sniffled quietly and stared at the ground while he was embraced. He wasn’t one to cry very often or easily, but he emotionally came to a point where he just couldn’t stuff it inside any longer and had to let it out. After all these long days alone in his room, he only let his emotions out when he was hugged in that moment. 

The first gentle touch in weeks.. it felt good. 

Eren didn’t care that this woman was a complete stranger to him, didn’t care what she’d think of him now, he just wrapped both arms around her waist and pressed his face into her shoulder. 

 

 

 

Silently, his tears streamed out of his eyes and damped her clothes- they were already wet from the rain so it shouldn’t really be much of an issue. Even if, he couldn’t care less in that moment. 

The brunette didn’t seem to mind Eren’s hugging and just held the fragile boy, lifting one hand to stroke his head a little. 

 

“It’s okay. I got you. I’m here.” A small whisper could be heard, “I’m not just going to let you live on the streets, not if I can change it. I’ll help you, okay? You’re not alone and whenever you need someone to talk to or any help, you can always come to me.”

Eren nodded, holding her a little tighter in response because he knew he couldn’t speak without bursting out in tears.

 

Eren wasn’t sobbing or making any bigger noises than small sniffles or hiccups, so he calmed down again rather quick and pulled back from her to rub his eyes. 

It was silent again but it looked like the brunette understood what must be going through Erens head and spoke, her voice gentle and soft, “Shall we go now? I wouldn’t want you to get sick, and it’s already getting late.” 

He didn’t hesitate to nod this time and let himself be pulled over to the car, taking a seat on the passenger seat with his bag pressed against his chest. 

 

 

 

The brunette lady took a seat as well and soon enough, the car started driving. 

“Oh- Don’t worry about drenching the seats. The car needs some cleaning anyway.” The woman hummed as Eren just nodded and buried his face into his bag. 

He just wanted to sleep, he was so tired and exhausted. Just let himself fall into a bed and stay there until he regained some of his energy back- he needed time to relax, only a bit, a little bit. 

 

“My name’s Hanji, by the way.” The brunette let out a small giggle. 

“Eren,” He mumbled in return and yawned as he turned his head to look out of the window.

“It’s really nice to meet you, Eren. I’m glad you’re agreeing to come with me. Things will be better soon, you’ll see.”

All Eren could do was nodding his head in response, too tired to actually speak up. At this point, he didn’t even care about where they might go, he just decided to let this stranger take him wherever she wanted to take him. 

 

Any place would be better than going back to his father and sister or sleeping on the streets. If he got a warm bed and some food, that’d be great already. For now, he didn’t need much more. 

 

 

 

The brunet felt how his eyelids started to feel heavier with every second and he barely was able to keep himself awake any longer. 

“You can sleep, Eren. It’s gonna take a while until we arrive.” Hanji informed him while Eren fought against it a few more times but eventually just gave up and let his eyes close slowly. 

 

He had to, there was no way he could stay awake any longer, even if he wanted to. 

Sleep was a good way to kill some time now so, without thinking about it too much, Eren let his body get some deserved rest and dozed off finally. 

 

“Sleep well, Eren...”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took so long I know but I kinda.. lost motivation? Idk. Life hasn’t been very easy haha

Sleeping in a car never really was very comfy; all that shaking and moving and rattling. There were better places to fall asleep in but since the poor brunet couldn’t hold himself awake any longer, this was the best he could get. Not that he was complaining, though.

He wasn’t dreaming much, it rather was just a big, black and empty nothing he saw. However, his body got some rest.

 

 

“Eren? Hey, Eren!” He could hear a voice near him calling and just groaned in response, not wanting to get up yet.

“Eren, wake up! We’re there! C’mon!”

Suddenly, he was violently being shaken around by someone and his eyes shot wide open immediately in panic before narrowing at the brunette next to him.

It took him a moment before he remembered; right. He was supposed to have somewhere to stay now? A new place he could live at.

Yawning, he slowly lifted his head and rubbed his face with both hands.

“Yay! You‘re up!” Hanji said joyfully and clapped her hands together in delight while Eren stared at her with exhausted eyes. He was still tired.

The brunette bent over Eren and pointed out of the window he was sitting at, which again was only one of so many times she had no clue what privacy even was.

But Eren wasn’t mad, he let it slide because this woman was seriously putting afford into helping him. And it wasn’t that she really did something wrong, he guessed she just really liked physical contact.

When he followed her gaze outside, he could see a big, white house with a beautiful garden. It was visible that whoever lived there was taking good care of the house and it’s surroundings.

Even at night, he could see that the garden was kept neat and that every tree and bush was on it’s designated, perfectly chosen place. There was something else standing in the garden he couldn’t quite make out yet since it was too dark to see it.

 

 

“That’s the place I told you about!” Hanji explained, happiness dripping with each word, “One of my best friends lives in there and he’s looking for someone to split the rent with. He doesn’t know anyone who would, so I-”

“-Woah, woah, woah! Now hold your breath for a second.” Eren sighed a little shakingly and ran a hand through his hair, “I don’t have enough money to pay for a house like that- actually... I don’t even have enough money to pay for a simple apartment...”

His gaze saddened and he slowly pulled his eyes away from that house, down at his lap instead. “I’m sorry... I should’ve told you before coming all the way here with you. I don’t have enough money nor a job a-and-”

“Shh..” A hand found it’s way to his mouth to stop him from talking- lucky him. He was getting nervous and was about to ramble on and on without an end.

The brunet looked at the woman with big eyes in silence who gave him nothing but a comforting and assuring smile. “I know, Eren. You don’t worry about that. Just stay here for tonight and we’ll talk about that tomorrow? I’ll come over in the morning and we’ll see what we can do, sweetheart. You just get in there, change your clothes and sleep, ‘kay? You don’t have to do much more for now.”

Eren was speechless, all he was doing was staring at this woman in stunned silence as he was told what to do. He couldn’t believe that, at the end, she really meant it and that he really could stay at such a beautiful place.. so she was telling the truth from the very beginning. He felt so thankful and grateful.

 

 

And without wasting any second, Eren pulled her into a tight hug and squeezed Hanji close to himself. “...Thank you.” It was a mere whisper, so Eren wasn’t really sure if she heard him or not but at least he could feel her arms around him in return.

“It’s okay.” Hanji cooed and began rubbing soothing circles against his back. “I told you it’ll be better soon, yeah? Just relax tonight and tomorrow we’ll take care of everything else. No need to worry about anything for now.”

The brunet hiccuped weakly, clutching onto the back of Hanjis shirt while he shut his eyes tightly and just held her. Some time passed like that in silence, with them hugging and Eren trying to keep his tears back.

 

 

Hanji was the first to pull back from the tight embrace and reached up to cup Eren’s face in her hands.

“No more crying, you hear? From today on, I only wanna see your smile and see you living a decent life. I’m here for you and I’m sure your new housemates will help you too. You’ll like them, they’re two wonderful people.” Her thumbs tenderly rubbed his cheeks as Eren cracked a small smile and actually leaned into her touches.

“Okay... Thank you, again. Thank you so much, Hanji. I’ll make this up to you one day, that’s a promise.” Eren took a deep breath, gathering himself to regain his composure.

 

The woman just giggled and nodded before opening the door and finally leaving the car. Eren did the same and threw his bag on, then followed Hanji over to the door and stood by her side.

As Hanji rang the bell, Eren inhaled deeply and braced himself to meet the people he would be living with from now it. He felt nervous because it already was getting dark and he didn’t want to bother anyone, though, he saw some lights still being on so he didn’t think anyone was sleeping yet.

There came a few noises from behind the door, which Eren couldn’t quite decipher, and a moment later, the door already opened.

 

 

“Shorty!” Hanji almost immediately exclaimed and draped her arms over the male who stood there with folded arms.

The man’s gaze was sharp and piercing, brows scrunched up in a frown. “Four eyes.” He greeted in return, his voice monotonous with no hint of emotion, unlike Hanji’s.

“Look, I’ve brought a friend with me!” She gestured to Eren who squeezed out a nervous smile.

That man was pretty short but he still had that intimidating gaze which just wouldn’t give away what he felt in that moment. Hate? Disgust? Anger? Confusion? Maybe even joy? Eren just couldn’t tell.

“I’m.. Eren. Eren Jaeger. Nice to meet you.” He stretched his hand out to greet the man but he was being solely eyed up and down and swallowed hard.

“And the hell are you doing here, Jaeger?” The raven questioned lowly and, thank God, Hanji took over the talking.

“Remember when you told me you were looking for someone to split the rent with?”

“I don’t.” The shorter male spat and narrowed his eyes at Hanji.

What a great feeling.

 

 

“Well, here he is! Ready to move in!” Even though Hanji spoke with so much determination and certainty, Eren could see that this man didn’t really want this.

“...Hanji?” Eren mumbled quietly and looked away, “I think it’d be better if I-”

“Big bro! Big bro!”

Eren was interrupted by someone and the last one he would’ve expected to see was a toddler rushing over to the door and staring up at him. He just gave the girl a small, confused and admittingly awkward wave together with a little smile.

“Who dat? Who dat?” The little girl bounced on her spot excitedly with big eyes, shining with curiosity, while pointing up at the brunet.

So he was going to live together with a man and a little girl? Eren didn’t really mind- he was just confused. And a little overwhelmed.

“Hey, Izzy!” Hanji said, crouching down and opening her arms to give the girl a hug and a kiss on the head which the girl didn’t seem to mind at all.

“Hanni! Hanni! Who dat?” She asked again, looking up at Eren together with Hanji.

“That’s Eren,” She grinned, “He’s your new friend! And he’s gonna live with you in your house from now on!”

“Oi,” The raven sounded, a low growl in his voice, but he could barely say anything when the girl gasped and took ahold of Eren’s hand.

“Niu frient!” She repeated with as much joy as Hanji and Eren almost mistook them for siblings. They were very familiar from their behavior.

“Com, com! Pway!” The girl began tugging on Eren’s hand for him to follow her inside.

Eren widened his eyes at that and immediately looked over at Hanji for help- he couldn’t just walk inside like that, could he?

Apparently, he could, judging by Hanji’s eager nodding. So, he decided to let the girl drag him inside and followed her into what seemed to be the living room.

 

 

On his way there, he noticed that the house was extraordinarily clean; he couldn’t see a single speck of dirt _anywhere_ , there was no dust anywhere either and, even with all the toys in the living room, everything looked so neat!

Eren was almost scared to sit down but did so when the girl tugged on his hand another time. He took off his bag and placed it on the floor next to him, put his hands on his lap and watched as Izzy hurried around to fetch her toys.

Some fell from her small arms without her even noticing, so she ended up picking them up several times.

It brought a smile on his face, seeing someone so careless and blissful, unaware of anything bad in the world. Being so happy to play with a complete stranger who apparently just became her new friend. It made Eren forget about his worries for a moment too.

Izzy brought all the toys over to where Eren sat and dumped them on his lap. She lifted one of the Barbie dolls for Eren to take and declared, loud and happy, “Dolly!”

Eren stared down at the naked doll for a moment or two before deciding to just play along and reached out for it, then held it up to her level.

“Hello, Izzy. How are you?” He spoke with a slightly higher voice to make himself sound more feminine and smiled at her.

The redhead clapped her hands and let out a giggle before plopping down on her butt and picking up a toy dog which looked like one of these mechanic ones which could make sounds and walk and what not. She held it in her hands and shook it as she looked at the doll in Eren’s hand, frowning softly. “Woof! Woof!”

Eren wasn’t sure if she tried to sound intimidating, since it actually was simply adorable to watch, but chose to play along and made a small, girlish scream before quickly moving the doll around as if it was trying to run away.

It made Izzy laugh like crazy. She fell back on the floor and kicked her feet around in joy. Even Eren had to laugh at the sight of her laughing like that. She was so cute.

 

The girl quickly sat up again and searched through her toys once again, this time holding up a bigger plushie of a monkey which had ridiculously long arms and legs.

“Ooh! Ooh! Aah! Aah!” She sounded and began shaking it, the long limbs bouncing around with her movements.

“Oh no! Such a big and scary monkey! There’s nothing I can do!” The brunet exclaimed with a gasp, “Please don’t eat me!”

Eren was amused and had fun to play with this adorable, little girl. He even forgot that he was in a stranger’s house and was playing with his sister; all he focused on in that moment was playing with Izzy.

 

Their game actually was the same all the time; Izzy held a toy up and made weird noises while Eren made the doll run away and the little girl ended up falling back and giggling like crazy. It still was fun to watch her laughing her ass off every time over something so simple, so Eren didn’t at all mind to do the same over and over again and kept playing with her happily.

Though, somehow, Eren couldn’t help but feel a little strange. He didn’t know why, but it felt like he met that man already. He couldn’t remember when or where or how, but the man’s face looked familiar... he just couldn’t quite make out how.

 

 

“Hey! Eren!”

His thoughts got interrupted by the squealing sound of a voice that couldn’t belong to anyone but Hanji.

“Hm?” The brunet turned his head over his shoulder to look at her and the man who stood by her side.

“You’re gonna stay here tonight. I’ll come over in the morning, then we’ll talk about everything in peace, yeah?”

The raven next to her didn’t look very pleased with having Eren stay over but he wasn’t saying anything against it either so Eren figured it was alright? He nodded, getting up from the floor at the same time.

“That’s... really kind of you. Thank you so much, Hanji.” He smiled at her before moving his eyes to the man, “And thank you for letting me stay here. I’m surely not going to cause any trouble for you!”

Eren was determined to do his absolute best to not be a bother in any way. It wouldn’t be a new thing for Eren to be hated or despised by people around him- that still didn’t mean he wouldn’t make the effort to at least lessen it and avoid the worst!

“Whatever.” The man answered coldly and Eren shrunk a little into himself when he noticed his glare, quickly averting his eyes to the ground.

Eren already felt hated and unwelcomed in this house, even if he barely did anything yet. Maybe that was just how this man was, or maybe that man really hated him for whatever reason, or maybe Eren was just imagining things. He prayed it was the latter.

“Great! I’m gonna go home then, I miss my babies already!” Hanji faked a dramatic sob and turned around to head back to the door, waving her arm until she was out and the door closed.

Silence.

 

 

 

The brunet pressed his lips together, letting his eyes trail around the living room, while the raven seemed to enjoy himself with glaring at him.

Eren couldn’t take this silence, it was unbearable for him, the pressure devouring him alive. It was as if he stood there for hours and was solely stared at, judged, pressured.

He swallowed thickly as a drop of sweat ran down his temple, his lower lip pressed between his teeth in utter silence. What was he supposed to do? He had absolutely no damned clue what to say or do and stood there like the biggest idiot ever.

Eren felt so stupid; standing there like a moron and doing nothing, seems like that was the only thing he was good at. Not even good, he just felt awkward.

 

 

 

“Big bro!”

Eren looked down and, thank God, his relief came in the form of Izzy who ran over to this man and hugged his legs.

“Niu frient!” The girl exclaimed and pointed at Eren, at the same time tugging at the shirt of who Eren now understood was her brother.

“Wanna pway! Wanna pway! Big bro pway! Nui frient pway! Izzy pway!” The small redhead began bouncing up and down in what could only be pure excitement and joy. Eren liked watching her this happy.

“No.” The raven stated firmly, making the girl look up at him with a pout and huge eyes. If she’d look at Eren this way, he’d do anything for her without asking why. “It’s already late. You need to sleep now. Clean up.”

Izzy looked back and saw all of her toys spread over the floor, nodded and rushed over to pick them up. For someone this energetic and playful, she listened quite well to what was told and did just that the moment she was told so.

There was a big, pink commode that didn’t at all fit into the living room; everything was white and clean and tidy, then there was this commode that was covered in stickers and glitter.

It didn’t look too bad, though. It was cute and showed that a child lived in this big house.

The girl hurried back and forth, dumping the toys into the drawers and closing them when they were full. It took her a few good minutes, but the living room was soon neat and tidy again.

 

 

 

“Cleen! Big bro, see? See?” She exclaimed proudly and earned herself a pat on the head.

“Good job.” The praise coming from her brother made Izzy even happier, if that was even possible, and made her clap her hands in joy. Though, she yawned just a moment later and tiredly rubbed her eyes with her small fist.

And with that, the girl was lifted and Eren watched them both leaving the living room.

“Bye, bye!” Izzy waved her hand rather lazily and gave Eren a somewhat sleepy smile.

Eren returned the wave and smile shortly and lowered his gaze to the ground once these two disappeared in a room, letting out a short breath. “Way to introduce yourself...” He mumbled to himself, almost sounding sad.

 

 

 

Could he really stay at a place like this? It felt so weird to be there, even more so with this strange man who he just didn’t at all understand!

He also looked so damn familiar but where the hell did Eren see him?

This man didn’t look like someone going to his school, so it couldn’t be that. And he looked a bit older than Eren so he probably didn’t even go to school anymore to begin with.

If Eren only saw him on the streets passing by, he wouldn’t remember his face like that. No, it had to be something else, something more important, something— and it suddenly hit him like a truck.

**Author's Note:**

> You can also find me on Tumblr! 
> 
> Kudos and comments are appreciated and give me motivation to keep going and help me to improve my writing. 
> 
> Thanks for reading <3


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